Awful Wednesday; in need of a warm hug :(

I've had such a bad morning, and morning as in from 2am onwards. I was still up...had a slight fever. I was switching off the coms, when I couldn't breathe. It's like getting suffocated. I've never had this so bad before. The last time was, in my sleep; I just couldn't suck in air, but thankfully, with the correct mindset, I managed to calm myself down. But yesterday's was totally different. I couldn't breathe, that's for one, the next thing I knew, I picked up the phone, to sms someone. That's when I started to get dizzy... I kinda panicked, coz it's something I've never dealt with before. Felt like another fainting spell was coming. I was quite scared.

After 15 mins or so... I regained my breathing pace. My head hurt like hell; I think due to lack of oxygen, and I was sweating for a bit. Cold sweat. It's like having period :(

Anyway, I went up to my room. I tried to sleep. I think I did when insomnia striked again. So, practically, I was up till around 4am. Wanted to tell mom, that I wasn't feeling well so I went into her room. But I saw her sleeping so nicely, I just couldn't wake her up.

So, I went to my room. Suddenly, I started crying... my chest hurt, tears came rolling down. I don't know why, I don't know why. I cried my heart out, just hoping that I wouldn't wake my parents up. I don't know how long I cried- I guess till I fell asleep.

When I woke up, it was 9.30am. Headaches were banging on my head, coughing out dry cough, and also still running on a slight fever. I've never been so sick this year. The last time was probably, 2 years ago. I had goldfish eyes; I was miserable.

Unfortunately, my dad was sick too. He had to see a doc last nite. Gastric problems. Not the ones because you didn't eat, but because of gas in the stomoch. He looked so strong, although I know the pain he was in. Get well soon, dad. *hugs*

So now, I'm weak, blogging and practically, feeling pain. I just needed to let it out here.

Here's a poem:-

Though times may be fun now,
I've never managed to know how,
You seem so near,
But yet, so far...
And all that's left,
Is this scar.
Seems that for you I will,
Put a happy smile,
And always be cheerful,
Taking it all in, with personal style.
Small things that count,
I wonder what I'd be,
But without knowing,
I did it; small things,
Worthy to see,
It always have been true,
Worry not,
It's only me.
There's been no lies,
Just sighs and glees,
But in the end of day,
I always look for something,
That could make you happy,
Enjoying it with you,
Anything new,
And never ever forget that,
I still and will always love,
You...